Its like a New Feeling every time.

Dedicated to Gautam Narayanan (Bro) & Radhika Lakhani (Bhabhi): YOU MADE IT THROUGH THIS, and STILL SAILING...

It’s like a new feeling every time; Falling in love. I am sure most of you would have thrown up by now. But really ... What’s worse? Being in love? Or the fact that at some point, we all have and just hurl to portray ourselves to be above it?

It’s like a new feeling every time, for cynics and critics alike. They fall the hardest- the ones who say “main iss chakkar mein nahin padunga bhai”. Both my best friends (A.S.M & D.S. - let’s stick to initials only) are living legends of the category. But you don’t know what you are missing when you don’t have something. It’s when you get it and it gets taken away from you that you realise what you had been missing for so long.

The palpitations, when you look at your phone and get that message after a long time; When you know that under normal circumstances you would answer instantly, but you restraint your reflexes for fear that it may make your excitement too obvious. You keep waiting for that good morning and good night. And you keep looking at your phone every 2 seconds thinking, abhi toh missed call nahi aayi!?

You keep wondering when you will bump into them next. You keep waiting for opportunities to talk, and speak sensible. You always have your foot in your mouth. You have no control over your short temper, irrespective of your natural temperament. And you never want to be the one to start arguments-although you always end up being the instigator, and God forbid on topics you know you will disagree on.

You hate it when your friends tease you, but you secretly can’t stop smiling to yourself every time their name is mentioned. You make them the reason for the “ek peg aur bas, phir aaj toh bol dunga”, and a fag each time you argue. And you promise yourself you won’t talk when you are pissed, and like a hopeless romantic you give up your anger...because hearing their voice is that drug which makes you forget the reasons for your anger in the first place. And you are pathetic enough to bend and break your own rules that you will not compromise or change yourself for someone...OH yeah! We have all been there and done that...

I see all these young love birds holding hands, locking fingers, guys hovering over their girls, stuffing one of the pair of headphones into each other ears listening to sappy love songs. And I can’t help but be cynical... Why do people make it so obvious? Why are people so in LURVE with each other? If they stood in front of you, and their partner wasn’t even there with them, their vocal modulations would be enough for anyone to guess who’s on the other end of that phone call.

The stupid smiles that we don’t even realise springs up on our face, when we’re lost in some distant thought or the FM just played a song you imagine singing for them. Everyone around you gives you obnoxious looks, as if they were about to hurl, like your self-indulgent smile was that obvious!!! I’ve been on that side, and this side of that smile. And I’ve been brooding after each time someone squashed the poor little heart too.

But it doesn’t stop skipping that beat...Dheeth hai saala, bechara dil kya kare! And it still springs out...at times. And recently, only two things made me do that, Raabta- the song from Agent Vinod, and a face I didn’t even know was a potential for heart-palpitation, but apparently, the heart did skip that beat... “tera milna hai uss rab ka ishara mano, Mujhko Banaya Tere Jaise Hi Kissi Ke Liye” were the exact words to be precise. It CONSUMES you till you get thrashed around, even if you get thrashed around and it just brings out your RESILIENCE even your mom wouldn’t know had existed!

Radhika Lakhani & Gautam Narayanan, I don’t know your song...but hey, you made it through all THAT obnoxiousness! (Kidding) And that counts. I know the heart still skips that beat when you two see each other, anyone who knows the two of you would warrant that...and I hope it stays so...

P.S.:As for my god-damn loser with the FACE, please realise it too...