Waiting in C.P.

[Text by D.B., Photos: Hindustan Times, D.B.]

[If my Title selection is getting too ‘direct’ day by day, I apologize. I guess it’s because I am not been able to think anything other than the ‘content’, when I am writing.]

Nothing on earth can be as fascinating as ‘Waiting’ for someone in C.P. (a.k.a.  Connaught Place). And I realized this a couple of days back when I had to wait for a friend who was coming in metro and to kill time I was just roaming around the place. ‘The Heart of the city’, as I call it, is in its 80’s and is getting ‘younger’ day by day. Being in C.P. in itself gives a feeling of celebrating a heritage.

“In 19^th century England, social life in cities and towns traditionally revolved around a central plaza with its shopping arcades, eateries and hotels. The British planned India's imperial capital and wanted the city to have a central business district of its own.”

                                                                                                                          Hindustan Times

Source : Hindustan Times

Source : Hindustan Times

Thus, C.P.’s construction began in 1929 and it was ready by 1933, as a ‘plaza’ for New Delhi and since then it has been the ‘Heart’ of the city. Every time I step into the heart, I feel a different beat! “Crowd ho to C.P. jaisa ho!” , is what my Uncle always say. Now, what he actually meant by ‘crowd’ is a different issue. But crowded Inner-Circle, everyone moving with the same speed, people waiting to cross the roads on each and every junction, long queues outside the Central Park, never ending rush outside Keventers, Mc Donald’s, etc., are common sights and ‘you-know-when-you-are-in-C.P.’ when you witness any of these. Like others, I usually know where am heading to and it’s always pre-planned, when I am in C.P. That’s how it goes! Unless you are an outsider, you never bother to stand in the middle of the circle and stare at others passing by. And even if you try to, it won’t help, as they are moving at a pretty fast pace. I used to be one of those ‘fast-pacers’ too till this day, when I started ‘Waiting in C.P.!’

I came to know that my friend is around one hour late and thus I decided to roam around. Merely after ten minutes of purposeless walk in the clock-wise direction, I realized people are looking at me curiously. It took a moment for me to learn that if you are C.P., you should have a partner! The first myth that “No one bothers about others in C.P.” went into trash. With hundreds of such ‘rounds’ already in my account, I decided to cease the walk, then and there. Moreover, Delhi’s heat too forced me to settle down somewhere. The renovation of the place due to the infamous Commonwealth Games has lead to few spots where one can actually sit and relax for hours. So, my resting point was between Block B & C. The curvilinear or rather ‘zig-zag-design’ benches made up of stone with ‘new’ hoardings, couple of metal ‘always-full’ dustbins and the much needed shade of trees were my companion for the next hour.

'Flavor' of C.P.

Even then, I was the only one who was alone. A couple was sitting on my right-hand side (eating Ice cream), murmuring to each other, two girls on my left (eating the Special Bombay Bhel puri) and chatting on some matter and people crossing  the road at some ‘50 per minute’ frequency. Some going towards right and others to the left, most of them were couples and those who were alone could be seen busy on cell-phone, in-uniform thus ‘office-goers’, groups of youngsters ‘laughing out loud’ (the LOL people), and some colleagues from the shops in C.P. itself, all in all, the ‘youth’ of C.P. could be seen sitting there alone. Out of the blue, a very quirky sound was heard, something sort of “Qweee! Qweee!”, on my right! It was not any bird, for sure, but I could guess that it was some vendor selling some toy making that sound. I couldn’t find the person at first and thus returned my focus towards the ‘crowd’. I couldn’t even get back to my ‘cone of vision’ and the sound came in again. I lost my focus completely!

What I saw was an aged man, very weak, flimsy, lean, wearing an old-fashioned photo-chromatic specs, dull-colored shirt and trousers, carrying a huge bag on his left shoulder, trembling at every step, holding two hand-puppets and making the ‘Qweee’ sound from it! The sight was terrible to see, at first. I thought he would fall down if he makes another step and was about to move towards him but stopped when I realized that he was fine and ‘happy’ with what he was doing. He had a smile on his face every time he saw any kid and blew the puppet more rapidly. I started feeling helpless that very moment and realized that I was not the alone doing that. The couple sitting next to me, those ‘busy’ people passing by, youngsters, those girls on my left, that person caught hold of everyone out there. Just when I was thinking that why on earth he’s doing such job a family stopped. The mother with a girl came to Uncle and started enquiring about the puppet. She discussed for a while and bought one for her daughter. The family left that very moment but I kept on looking at him. He kept the money in his pocket and decided to take out one more from that huge bag. Tackling with the bag, happiness could be seen on his face. Then he suddenly decided to sit first. It seemed difficult for him to take those few steps towards the bench as he was not able to manage with the ‘fast’ moving crowd. But, he did and sat with those two girls on my left. The moment he settled, the girl offered him water, which he refused to take, with a smile. I realized that I am not the only one watching & concerned about him. He would have seen C.P. being built, I wondered. As he settled, safe and fine, I felt that I should move on and look for my friend.

“It would take another half an hour”, the text came and thus the next stop for me was a bench just outside the metro Exit no. 2, in front of Block B. This section had less but frequent movement. Mostly the groups of colleagues from the nearby shops could be seen. Saw a couple eating the Rs. 5 Ice Candy and the guy missed his last bite which fell into his shirt-pocket to which three of us started out laughing. Worst part, they noticed me noticing them. They smiled and the girl started helping the guy clearing the mess. Delightful. My eyeballs stopped when I saw a girl talking to the same puppet-wala Uncle. This time he was sitting on the steps of a shop and was responding to the girl with the same smile on his face. After few minutes, the girl went on and Uncle, again, went on with his job.

I got stuck in a mix of feelings. An old man with such attribute, reminding me of the tale of Kabuliwallah and on the other hand, the youngsters, the youth of the city helping him, is caring about him. The place where all this is happening is itself old, tattered, still standing and making its presence felt, trying to move and withstand the ‘fast’ pace.

In Architecture, we keep on asking ourselves, “What makes a ‘space’ a ‘place’..?

Dedicated to all the vendors, hawkers and ‘people’, together who make C.P. a ‘Place’!

Special Thanks to the friend who came late. It was worth it! :)

Farewell!

[Text and Photos by D.B.]

It’s been quite a long time that I penned something. Was busy with exams, submissions, juries, etc., (all the ‘Archies’ out there would understand). What brought me back to writing is also one of the occasions which kept me engaged, The Farewell for the senior batch!

The moment I say ‘Farewell’, almost everyone would start thinking about the college days. Well, this is a fact that ‘college days’ are the best days of your life and ‘The Farewell day’ has to be one of those days. I like the concept personally. Enjoying and partying out especially when you are drenched in nostalgia. It is the best time to get your emotions out for those who are leaving and also making them realise that they are leaving, so that, they can get emotional too!

What makes a farewell so special? What makes it a ‘moment-to-be-cherished-always’?

It’s the relationship, the bond, between the Senior and the Junior!

The minute we step into our college-life, especially those who live in hostels, we meet a bunch of young guys, merely a year older, they are no different from us but a bit more confident and has a ‘tag’ of being ‘seniors’ and thus we start looking up to them. In the beginning, they seem to be the ‘worst’ of all, then they become your ‘guide’, then a ‘friend’ and by the time this ‘farewell’ thing comes up, they are the ones whom you gonna ‘miss the most’! They are always there whatever may come.

When you need them?

Its 2:30 AM, the Nescafe is going to be shut within few minutes, you skipped your dinner, you are out of money, you see your senior standing at the counter window and, “Bhaiya!!”, out of blue he becomes your elder brother. You request, “kuchh khilao na! Please!”. He doesn’t have a single penny still ‘treats’ you and asks the vendor to put the bill in his ‘account’!

Your final exam days and you just realised that you don’t have your notes! “Sir” or “Ma’am”, are the terms which seldom works in these ‘crisis’-conditions. “Sir, notes dhundo na!”, “Apna 5^th Sem ka assignment do na!” , “Main naam change kardunga, pakka!”  And, your submission is done. Sometimes, they might even charge fees like getting their water-bottles filled, borrowing LAN-cables for few days, or even pen-drives, etc. But, that is OK!

Emotional ‘break-down’. You are going through the ‘so-called’ difficult phase; you ‘failed’ in love. You cant share with anyone and suddenly you find your ‘Doc’ in him/her. They see your face and could tell the problem. You drain out all in front of them and gets the best advises to move on in life as they already have been through all this. “Chal na! Bhool ja, kuchh fayeda nahin hai, bata, kya khayega?”, with this they cheer you up and you move on!

When they need you?

They have a back-log, worst part, they don’t know the date of the exam. They come up to you, “Oye! Exam ka kuchh bata diyo bey!” And you smile and say, “O! Don’t worry!”

Final exams and submissions, they need huge army to complete their pending jobs. They call upon everyone, they set up the battle-field for their soldiers, they arrange food, water and makes sure that everyone is happy and working. They buck-up the ‘young-guns’, “Katal sketching karta hai bey!”, “Yaar! Tu toh architect ban gaya!”, “Mere Thesis mein help tu hi karega!”, “Teri to treat pakki!” And the work is completed with full force.

When they unite?

What all you need to bring them ‘down’ to your level is, “Play the Music”! The moment a party starts, it’s impossible to say who is who! Juniors and seniors, all roll on together!

And, finally, they get ‘high’ together! ;)

In the end, we bridge the gap; we face the most difficult part of this ‘relationship’. Standing at the verge, from where we get separate! Everyone’s happy for the time passed by and everyone’s sad for the future, as it is to be traversed alone, without the ‘guidance’, without the ‘support’. But we all ‘celebrate’ it, we say “good bye” with cheerful faces and we “hug” with closed eyes hoping to meet up somewhere in life and say, “Arey Sir Ji! Aap???”

Dedicated to all my seniors.. Obviously! Will miss you all!

SHE’S ALWAYS A WOMAN TO ME...

TO my mother, whom I LOVE for everything she has let me be even when told "ladki hai, itna uchalne mat do!"

 TO my sisters- who have been god sents, and 

TO my grandmother: Although I thought she'd much rather have had grandsons, I only realised in her last moments what I meant to her and She meant to me... 

Satyamev Jayate... Aamir Khan’s latest show today chose the topic of female foeticide in India. Why does it take this man to make us realise our strength? I mean indulging in stupid discussions like he's a man, and would we have reacted the same had a woman anchor anchored the show, is for the foolish. Man or woman, the issue at hand is bigger, not the anchor of the show. My point is, why a TV show, and why a popular icon and why only Aamir Khan.. to realise the evil that lurks amongst us?

How many mothers had suffered multiple abortions killing one child after the other because their in-laws didn’t wish for girls.... my eyes were moist with the least of realisation. It was reflex, I don’t think it needed reasons, it just needed stimulus, and the pain followed unconsciously. Not just for that unborn foetus, but I don’t think words can describe what that mother must have suffered killing a part of her every time. Ever heard a mother talk about her infant? Ever realised how much joy every action of those ten little fingers and ten little toes gives them?

How much she must have prayed to never have conceived, so that she wouldn’t have to kill her child if it turned out to be a girl. Enough to cause NUMBNESS...to think that women are such mute entities even today! And it isn’t just rural India. In fact I think Rural India respects womanhood more than Urban India. I mean anything and everything walking on two feet and feminine is meant to be an object of tease, cat-calls and obscene gestures on the streets of my city. The least you expect is at least the educated to behave humane.

I write today humming by Billy Joel in the back of my mind:

"She'll promise you more than the Garden of Eden,
She'll carelessly cut you and laugh while you're bleedin...
She'll bring out the best and the worst you can be
Blame it all on yourself,
Cause she's always a woman to me"

Womanhood is beautiful. It is pure nature, pure artistry and pure expression. The right woman can make the man want to be a better person, a deserving match. The right woman can make or break a man. Losing the right woman can make him go Insane.

Meenakshi- a word that describes the fish shaped full eyes, eyes that are the knives that penetrate the heart, can pierce through great men. Anger, anguish, pain and tears in the eyes of the woman you love can be fatal. I remember a friend of mine telling me after I had poured out in front of him, “How do you girls do it seriously? Cry and talk at the same time. Please don’t ever do that again. It hurts to see you cry and struggle for words, really. It’s like background music, when you speak and that tear runs along your cheek. Its torture”

Dharini- a word that describes the mother Earth; Earth is called Mother earth- not Papa Globe because the female is a symbol for sustenance, of patience. They nurture you in their womb, bring you into this world, make you into the person you become, give you an extra morsel from the one on their plates, give you the spot of the bed that is more cosy, and cherish that old worn out saree that you might have bought them from your first salary, because they can do all of it in a heartbeat if they love you.

Nautanki – Imagine two college girls in full animation gossiping about someone among themselves on a hot summer day, giggling, clapping hands, tossing their hair around and covering their mouths bursting into laughter. No matter how muggy and jampacked the bus is, they are busy chatting in their own world, and the whole janta around them stares. Forget about the 45 degree temperature and the smell of hot metal, they laugh to themselves when the girls laugh too hard, they smile when the girls pass a snear at someone, and in general the whole act is very engaging. I don’t think the male gender will ever be able to be as expressive or command as many eyes as women.

Nalini- Delicate and gentle as the dawn, it reminds me of a woman’s fresh face, fresh after a shower with her hair soaking the sun in the wind, moist from the head bath, eyes looking down away from the sun in a white kurta with chicken embroidery on a summer morning on her terrace.  And the minute those eye look up and right into yours, the air in your lungs get stuck for that split second, and gushes out the next second, expressing your exact emotion “hai” – of redemption. Very Aditya Chopra, I know, but women can really be mysterious, vulnerable and strong all within seconds.

Dhairyam- She can be strong in times when you doubt yourself. My mother always did it with her glass full of Haldi Doodh and lots of Aloo Sabsi when I was down and low. My best friend does for me each birthday with our customary pancakes and maple syrup breakfast at McDonalds at 7:00 am. It’s just a reassurance for me to hang in there through the bad times and the good times. They can walk with you and hold your hand right when your ex walks past you even if you don’t want them to because they know you need it. They can just ruffle your hair up after you’ve vented out your daily frustrations to them in a flurry of sentences, and that feels better than a Kerala Massage.  

They can read your mind at times without the need to fill the pauses with words. Women are truly magical. I am sure our mothers would have made it through the darkest times without shedding a tear in front of us, for fear that we may realise that our idols are really not shatter-proof. Its resistance and strength under torsion...

And the last- is the Chaaturyam- Cleverness: A woman’s foxy smile can turn the spotlight on, in a crowd, in solitude or in a candle light...and we sure know how to wield it in different directions. Sometimes it lightens the moods, sometimes it leads men on, sometimes it just says, “It is funny, but stop before I’m pissed off.” When she huffs and says, “Why should I only compromise?” it simply means I just want you to take care of my illogical whim this once.  When she picks up the phone with a “hmmm”, the same hmmm can be one of affection or one of disappointment, and they are worlds apart, just the hmmms...

When you ask her why she is serious, she says “nothing”, it means it is nothing that you can solve, so if you are going to give her an advice or a solution, shut it. And when it continues on to “it’s just that...” it means just listen to her and let her get it out. She is smart enough to solve it herself. Never tell a woman you know more than her about herself, she can throw a canon ball to wipe that smug smile off your face. Never underestimate the wickedness of a woman she’s a devil if she wants to pry your secrets out of you. Let her be a child - taken care of, and well protected but never call her childish- she is mature enough to fend for herself, and old enough to understand your intentions well. Let her fall from her mistakes but just be there to catch her, not to stop her from falling. And always love your woman, your mother, your sister and your grandmother like you would want to be loved in return. You can’t bargain with them because they are way way way better at bargains than you will ever be.

And these are just a few, I can just go on listing like saundarya, shringara, amtaja, shakthi and many such beautiful words of Sanskrit that were moulded around women...but in the words of the great “No one killed Jessica...”

“Thodi si Kameeni, Thodi Namkeeni

  Thodi si Nasheeli Thodi Zehreeli hai...”

I was reading my diary a few days ago and I had once written in it after a break up, “I have done this quite a few times now. I just can’t get in and get out again. My heart will not be able to take it… there is only a certain saturation to anyone’s hurt and pain, and mine is almost there.”

When’s our saturation coming? When do we as women start respecting ourselves and the women around us? When do we start treating our daughters and daughters-in-law the same?

And not as mere male child-bearing machines but a creation above them all- like God’s muse. Great battles have been fought over a woman’s ego and her honour.

And I think the guys will agree with me when I say the act of “nautanki”- melodrama will be missed the most in a world without women. It will be a dry world without expression, a world without heartbreaks, and a world without love....Satyamev Jayate, do we really need that to tell us something we already know? 

Niet...